• 2016.06.06(月)
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My life in a nutshell

Yesterday was such a fucked up day for me.
I went to Osaka for an interview.
The company paid for me of course. Yayy, Osaka. Haven't been there for years. So hey why not visit a few places while you're there??
But as much as I wanted to stay longer in Osaka and visit a few places alone, I had to go back again to Tokyo on the same day because I had another job interview scheduled with another company in Tokyo on the next day (which is today).

So, last week I went and booked shinkansen tickets.
Somehow, my stupid brain told me to book seats with reservation.
I just realized how stupid I was, the day before yesterday. Reserved seat = can only get on the train on the booked time.
And the time I booked was a little....ぎりぎり? I wanted to go back to Tokyo as soon as possible (totally NOT in the mood of sightseeing in Osaka) that I didn't think much about other possible scenarios. What if the interview ended up later than the schedule? What if the subway train got delayed?
.....so yesterday I decided to come to Tokyo station early and change the time.

I got on the train (my station is in Yamanote line)....and transferred to Chuo line at Shinjuku, hoping to arrive at Tokyo 10 minutes faster.
Oh you know what, it turned out that Chuo line got delayed because of some inspection in Ebisu.
After like 3 minutes standing in the train waiting for it to move, the staff announced that people who are going to Tokyo better use Yamanote line right now........err. So I decided to go back to where I came from: the same Yamanote line.
If I had known Chuo line got delayed, I would have just stayed in Yamanote line and didn't need to even step my foot in Shinjuku!!!! Urgh.

So anyway. No problem. Still had time to queue and change my ticket's time.


Got on the train that left at 11:10 am.
I sat behind an Indonesian family who got off at Kyoto station. Ah.....I felt so sad.
They're going to have fun visiting temples while I'm like..........ah. Job interview. In city I'm not familiar with. So depressing.
13:40, arrived at Shin-Osaka station. Good, I still had plenty of time to do nothing and explore the station! or so I thought.
I bought the subway ticket beforehand and went to McDonald's. Bought a spicy chicken. Sat and did nothing....for like 20 minutes or so. Played with my iPhone. When I realized, it was already around 14:40...?? I'm so good at wasting time doing nothing.
So I decided that it was time to move and get on the subway train.

This is the only photo I took when I was in Osaka.
Why? You'll know why later in this post.


Arrived at the station near the company at around....15:15 or so.
My interview is at 15:40.
And you know what

My iPhone was suddenly........dead.
I couldn't turn it on.
And the button was super hot. Like really really hot....it's literally burning.
It was still around 70% before it was dead, what the fuck??????

I panicked. I didn't know the way to the company. It's supposed to be 3 minutes from the station, but which way???
I've never even been to this freaking station.
Their Osaka office is not written anywhere in the company's booklet.
No address, no telephone number.
I didn't print the map on their website.

I was literally fucked up.

I met some workers and asked about the company. But they didn't know the way unless I have the address.
Oh fuck.
15 minutes passed...it was already 15:30...ergh.....until I finally met an office lady (who seems to be working at a bank or post office) and I asked her about the company.
She didn't know where their office is, but she was kind enough to google it for me. Finally!
I found the building. Urgh. An old building, it was.
Got in like 5 minutes before the interview.
So, I was not late at all. But I was sweating.
It rained in Tokyo but it definitely didn't rain in Osaka.

I immediately sat in the waiting room and was told to write my travel route and the expenses, so that they can transfer the money back to me....
but I was like
I need time. I just got lost. Lol. Sorry. I said something like can I write later or sth.
The kind interviewer invited me to just come to the interview room and write it together before the interview.
Ah, okay.
So things just went from there......
The interview finished almost 20 minutes later than the schedule.
I went back to Shin-Osaka station.
My phone was still dead. And hot as fuck.
The fuck.

So okay.
At least I had my shinkansen ticket and still had time to buy bento for dinner.
I hung around the station a bit and bought bento.
I still had like 40 minutes so I asked the information about the nearest au shop (my provider) but there was none near the station so I gave up and decided that I would just look for the shop in Tokyo.
Got on the shinkansen at 17:50.

My phone stayed dead.........all the way through the journey to Tokyo.
I ate my dinner, read the booklet to prepare for tomorrow's company's interview a bit (but I then fell asleep)...and slept until the train arrived at Shin-Yokohama.
I woke up.
My phone was still dead and hot.

Until finally when the train was nearing Shinagawa station..........it cooled down and responded to my touch.
The screen said that it's out of battery and needs to be charged.

So I immediately charged it, even though it was only for 2-3 minutes cos the train was already nearing Shinagawa.
Fuck this phone............fuck this day...........fuck my life.........
It seems that someone DOESN'T WANT ME TO GO to Osaka.

Deep in my heart I don't want to leave Tokyo, but I need a job and I don't know where life will take me anyway....
I actually just got a phone call from the company today and they wanted me to come to the third (final) interview on Monday.
What. Oh at least it's not in Osaka.
But I will most likely be working in Osaka if I got accepted to that company........or even other random places in Japan other than Tokyo.... :/

I also just had an interview with the company I mentioned early in this post. (the reason I couldn't stay longer in Osaka lol)
Had the interview at 14:00...and they called me 2 hours later, telling me that I passed it and then I had the second interview scheduled on Tuesday.

Oh my.

Oh and btw, suddenly lots of people are coming to Japan.
My friend is coming next week.
My sister is coming on Friday.
My friend's friend is coming too and we promised to hang out.

All are here when I'm still in the middle of job hunting.....


Maybe I should write more

I just realized that I haven't been updating my blog so often these past few months.
At the same time, I'm getting more and more depressed........ perhaps writing more would help me to become less depressed.
My depression has been constant since high school, it hasn't changed no matter where I am and what my relationship status is, and as graduation draws near it gets worse and worse.........
Nobody understands me and I don't really have anyone to talk to....those who listen will always blame me for my situation (yes, fucking things up and getting myself mentally ill is my specialty in life because I'm such a weak human being whose suffering is so low-level compared to what other people suffer).......ah. Why am I so pathetic? Oh yes, I deserve this. I know.

I decided that I want to update this blog more often. It kinda makes me feel a little productive. (err...not really.)
Ugh. The point is, I am alone and so depressed with everything so I need to find a way to relieve my stress and everything that's been on my mind lately.
I don't want to make this blog a depressing blog.........though I tend to do it because I'm so pathetic and such a failure.

Random things that have been going through my mind recently:

1. It's getting really hot lately and I hate it. Why is it so sunny? Is that.......two pieces of shrimp tempura I was seeing when I was on my way to BBQ today?


2. I have the feeling that nobody would want to hire me unless they have no other good candidate available....because oh my qualifications look good on paper but then you meet me in person and I'm like this awkward person who totally sucks at oral communication in whatever language, even in my mother tongue I still suck......if I do sales nobody would want to buy what I sell because I'm just so bad at explaining and negotiating.

3. I can't believe I've lived in this world for more than 20 years already. Which means...I'm an adult? I still think that I'm under 18 years old sometimes and that I shouldn't be making so many dirty jokes with my friends (and I mostly joke about shits like this with my guy friends casually) hahahAHAHA.

4. My cooking sucks........ah.....I don't ever want to cook for anyone (except maybe for some unfortunate guy who will be my partner in the future if I ever end up marrying someone)

5. I'm very broke right now. (seriously)


Cursed Child

So, some people in the UK have seen the previews of the newest Harry Potter play, which is basically the eight story that takes place 19 years after HP 7.
Even though JK Rowling herself asked the viewers to 'keep the secret', there are still of course some people who leak the spoilers. God bless them.
I love spoilers.
Especially because I can't go to the freaking UK to watch the play.
Reading spoilers is one of the few exciting(?) things that I look forward to these days.
I've been so depressed lately. I need something to cheer me up. Why should I wait?

I've read the spoilers of both parts of the play! I found out about them on tumblr and reddit.
Hahaha. First thing I literally did after waking up today: opened my laptop and read the 2nd part spoilers.
They just had the preview yesterday in the UK.

Some people like it, some people don't.
I personally like it...???

I wanna talk about this so I'm gonna put this post under the cut.
If you happen to stumble upon my blog and don't want to know about the spoilers, don't read the post under the cut.

カテゴリー:Harry Potter

What's the opposite of the word 'original'?


sorry, I laughed way too hard at this joke.


Harry Potter

I want to talk about this series.
I am feeling so shitty today and I need to cheer myself up.
Harry Potter has become my recent obsession.
I've watched Harry Potter since the movie came out when I was still in elementary school.
I think it was when I was in first grade? I remember watching it with my family. Also had the CD/DVD.
I always watched the movie every time it came out. The first until the eight.......I watched all of them.
Six years ago, I bought the final book. It was on discount.
I was curious about the ending and decided to sneak a peak before the last movie came out.
You see, I had never read any of the books before.
Harry Potter is such a common book that most of my friends have in their home, but I was just not interested in reading fantasy novels.
To be honest, I only bought it to read the last few pages cos I wanted to know the ending before the movie came out! hAHAHahAHAHA
Even if I read the book from the first chapter, I didn't think I could understand the story anyway cos I've never even read the previous books.
I thought I'd rather watch the movie. I'm a movie person.

I always like the movies. I enjoy watching them..
I haven't read the books but I did some research here and there to find out more about the stories and characters.
Ah, I love the characters. The actors are also perfect (though I think some are too old for the role?).
The Half Blood Prince movie has the best promotional posters, I think.
The theme of the movie is so dark and the characters look cool in these posters.



Let's talk about the characters in those posters.... (from left to right, up to bottom)
Yeah I really am this bored and have so much time to write this post. What am I doing with my life?

The trio wouldn't have survived without her. I think Emma Watson is perfect for the role. If you look up this character in fanfictions though...you will find that she's very popular and people pair her up with all (or almost all??) the male characters in the series?? LOL.....

Unfortunately, I knew Dumbledore would die before the movie came out because spoilers are everywhere on the internet...so it wasn't a surprise anymore. Thought he would just come back again just like Gandalf, but nope....?
I like the Dumbledore in the first and second movie better than the other one, btw. He looked wiser. But the second one looks......gayer.....err, which is not wrong, cos Dumbledore is gay.....but still, I like the first one cos he's all wise and shit. LOL

Ah, that poor child who used to live under the cupboard. He can be so stupid sometimes....typical of a main protagonist character? This screenshot below sums up my opinion.


He's funny but......not my kind of guy. I can't believe he fell for Lavender Brown??? And he can be so immature sometimes?? In my opinion, he shouldn't be paired with Hermione in the end....cos that girl is too smart for him. Even Rowling herself regrets pairing him with Hermione.

Bellatrix Lestrange
Her last name speaks for her character. I don't like her, by the way. But I admire the actress who played her. She's awesome, really.

Severus Snape
I secretly(?) like him. HAHAHA. I have a lot to say about him. I like him a lot more since the last movie came out. But basically, I like him because:
- he looks bad but is actually good
- he's so cold and dark
- his sarcasm!! fuck he's my type of person
- his love for Harry's mom and how he always protected Harry
- he's a genius
- he's the youngest teacher in Hogwarts (I'm talking about the book. Rickman was too old to play Snape, actually)
- I'm not a fan of black hair, but I like the contrast between his dark hair and pale skin
- his deep silky voice
- his mother's family name (what does this have to do with this list?)
- this is so random, but...I like how his hair covers his face sometimes (?????) sorry, fetish

tumblr_o7x1inbueS1sfmnojo1_400.gif Severus-Snape-severus-snape-22775377-296-198.gif

Draco Malfoy
Ask my 8 year old self who's my favorite character and I would have answered Draco. He has always been my favorite character since the beginning of the series! And I still like him. Reasons:
- he's cute (uhm, or handsome I mean)
- he's blond
- the way he dresses
- the way he says "Potter" hahahAHAHHAA I love it
- he's bad
- but actually not so bad at heart
Anyway, anyway, I like him mostly because his looks are totally my type. Such a heartthrob. But personality wise, he's not so appealing....cos of the "my father will hear about this!" thing he always says hahaha


Fenrir Greyback
Ah, I don't like this character. He's too evil.
Yes, that's all I have to say. HAHA.

I'll talk about this series again later.

カテゴリー:Harry Potter




I speak nonsense.