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2016年02月

DATE

  • 2016.02.16(火)
  • Fuck
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Fuck


Hello.
I don't update my blog often anymore.
I want to update it often but I just can't find anything to talk about lately.

I have a lot of work to do but I have no motivation to do anything at all....
I won't do anything today before lunch. Yeah, I don't care.
I have a lot of things on my mind.
Nothing has really changed since high school.
I'm still depressed and don't know what to do in my life.

High school was the beginning of the dark period of my life.......
when I thought it would get better after I entered uni, it only got worse and worse.
I feel very stupid and I'm falling behind even further from my friends.
I'm not even sure if I could get a job or do any job.
I may be only good at doing passive things people tell me to do, like memorizing materials for exams and sitting nicely without saying anything.
I have no ambition to do anything great in my life. I no longer have the passion to do anything.

And I begin to question whether I can go on like this or not.
Probably not.
But I can't communicate like a normal human being (?)....well I don't know.
It just seems like I've lost the ability to socialize.

I'm always the outsider in every group.
The person who wouldn't be anyone's first choice.
The one whose post you always ignore. (lol. fuck you all, tasteless grownups.)
I'm not even close to anyone. I don't keep in contact with people as often as before.
I feel that nobody probably truly likes me from their heart. (well with the exception of my parents tho)
I don't like people and so far I never have any meaningful relationships with anyone.
Or maybe deep in my heart I don't want to be with anyone because I hate people.
Or maybe I haven't found the right person.
Fuck, I don't know.

I'm mentally tired and feeling so lost.

カテゴリー:未分類

Happy Chinese New Year!


I'm home and I'm so lucky to be able to spend Chinese New Year with my family this year.

IMG_7361esiphone.jpg

I cut my hair, btw.....and I REGRET IT........ ;______;
It's too short for my liking.
But then I'm like fuck it I'm going to do job hunting and will just tie my hair all the time.

I think I'm coming home too often.
I always look forward to see my family of course, but at the same time I always feel like I'm wasting my time.
I never do any internship or part time jobs.....because I always fly home during long breaks.
And I'm going to do job hunting soon, which worries me a lot.........

Why do I fly home so often?
Because I gotta practice driving. (which I'm still so bad at)
And because maybe my parents miss me, since I never call them.

Anyway here are some photos from my daily life lately.

January 31. It's 31 (baskin robbins) day and I got 31% discount for the ice cream!

IMG_7252esiphone.jpg

My favorite cat plushies.

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Milk chocolate pie at Lotteria.

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In front of a toy store.

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Part of Harajuku I had never visited before.

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Mexican dinner. Hohoho.

IMG_7328esiphone.jpg

Poor people who cannot grow a mustache.

IMG_7331esiphone.jpg

Haneda airport. No one was here!

IMG_7338esiphonem.jpg

I saw Star Wars airplane!

IMG_7339esijhpone.jpg

Some snacks with Royce chocolate. I brought this all the way home just to eat them with my family hahaha

IMG_7354esiphone.jpg

カテゴリー:未分類

だっくくろっく

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♥vachuu♥

Author:♥vachuu♥
I speak nonsense.
英語は母国語ではないけど英語を使うのが好きな人。

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