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2015年08月

DATE

  • 2015.08.24(月)
  • 2015.08.20(木)
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Summer illumination


I went to Aeon mall again yesterday.
It felt kinda weird to see illumination at this time of the year.

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My camera bokehd everything..........lol

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I can't believe it's almost the end of August already.
Ah...........
I have tons of stuff to do.
I have to start working on my thesis....
and start to think about my plans for the future as I'm going to be a senior soon........

What do I want to do in the future?
I don't want to go home
I don't want to get married
I don't want to work
I don't want to take care of others

I just want to be a potato..........

#lifecrisis

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Some food.


This blog has too much negativity already and I think I should post photos of food once in a while.
Food.
Yes, food...

The stuff I ate at some restaurants in PIK a week ago with my family.
Crowded place I would not go to so often cos it's far from my house.

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Not too impressed with the taste.

Some dessert shop. It seems popular cos I've been seeing the ice cream photo a lot on instagram.

Purposely chose this photo to upload cos I'm a jerk.
You should wear a belt, sir.

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It looked cool. Tasted okay.

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I'm sleepy and should go to bed soon.

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Literally I have nothing I want to do in my life.
I have no dream. No passion.
And I can go on and on about this....

I'm very very tired.
Mentally.
(Physically soon, perhaps, as I'm getting older and the negativity is consuming me)

In high school, I would have said the same thing as today.
Nothing has changed, since I lost my passion to the nazi institution.

People come and go but they can't help me.
They have their own lives to live. And I'm not part of them anyway.

I live my life like a living zombie.

Fuck

Even though it's still holiday, I'm very tired and can't function well.
Can't do my work today.
Will try to do it later at night.

Too many brain cells have died. I'm sorry.

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What's the point of living when you can never feel happy?

I'm not going to do anything.
I'm just.....tired.

I've always been thinking about my existence and I just can't find any reason that can convince me that I deserve this life.

I used to be happy.
But after I graduated from junior high, it seems that nobody can make me happy anymore.
I have no dream.
Everything is meaningless for me.
Prestigious uni? Good grades? Boyfriend? Place I want to live? I have them all.
But I feel nothing for them. (and that's sad)
Or maybe I just haven't found the one.
Or maybe I just hate people and I feel nothing for anyone. And no material in this world can make me happy, of course.
Maybe I'm destined to feel alone all the time.


I can't find anyone or anything that can tell me that this life is worth living for.

I'm tired of everything and I hate the feeling of loneliness that haunts me all the time.
Nothing seems to matter anymore.


I'm not going to do anything, though.

I don't care if I'm still breathing or not in the near future.
Still alive? That's nice. Still tired though.
Not alive? Okay. Won't be too sad about that.

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New mall in town


I went to Aeon mall with my family last week.
It's so big........bigger than any Aeon I've visited in Japan.

It looks a lot like the one in Japan.
Except that they sell sushi and other food in separate booths outside the supermarket....

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The cashier.

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Cheap sushi.

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Like, seriously really really cheap.
Around 30 or 60 yen for one sushi. And they're not bad.

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It's not so crowded cos we visited the mall during weekday.

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The food court.

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I like the mall, overall......but it's too far from my place.

I have nothing interesting to post lately.....
I've been in Jakarta for 2 weeks now. I feel that the days are longer here and everything goes so slow.........
I noticed that people here walk slower compared to people in Tokyo.
So..........slow.

It's rare that my family can gather together. I don't know where I'd be next summer......
I want the time to stop.

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♥vachuu♥

Author:♥vachuu♥
I speak nonsense.
英語は母国語ではないけど英語を使うのが好きな人。

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